Love Actually Billy Macks 10 Most Hilarious Quotes

Love Actually: Billy Mack’s 10 Most Hilarious Quotes

Love Actually might be a Christmas romantic comedy, but Bill Nighy’s sarcastic and mean Billy Mack steals the film with these hilarious quotes.

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There are many storylines in the Christmas classic Love Actually, a movie that is known for its saccharine romances and powerhouse cast of British acting talent. One of the film’s most iconic storylines, however, is one that actually takes up relatively little screentime: the comeback attempt of aging musician Billy Mack, as expertly portrayed by Bill Nighy.

Billy’s journey consists of his character producing an incredibly corny Christmas version of one of his old hits, and his efforts to ensure the song is a number one hit by year’s end. What makes the storyline work so well is, of course, Nighy’s commitment to the role, but also Billy Mack’s completely hilarious and sarcastic commentary along the way.

Billy Criticizing The Current State Of Music:

“Wouldn’t It Be Great If Number One This Christmas Wasn’t Some Smug Teenager, But An Old Ex-Heroin Addict Searching For A Comeback At Any Price?”

Because of his decades of experience in the music industry, Billy has a sharper understanding of the way the world works than most other characters in the movie. His attempt at returning to his former musical glory is an obvious cash grab, and he has no qualms about that fact.

But he also has absolutely no hesitation when it comes to calling out the “smug teenager[s]” populating the music industry at the moment, while also promoting himself, “an old ex-heroin addict searching for a comeback at any price.”

Billy’s Grand Romantic Gesture:

“It’s A Terrible, Terrible Mistake, Chubs, But You Turn Out To Be The F**king Love Of My Life.”

There is no overarching romantic Love Actually storyline for Billy’s character, but by the movie’s end, Billy finds a quasi-romantic connection of his own with his best friend and manager, Joe. Even after Billy has achieved the success he so desired, he realizes that there is something more important to him.

Of course, in the process of conveying this realization to the adorably humbled Joe, Billy has to deliver the profession of feelings with as much sarcasm and as many insults as possible when he says, “It’s a terrible, terrible mistake, chubs, but you turn out to be the f**cking love of my life.”

He’s Never One To Care About The Details:

“Billy, I Understand You’ve Got A Prize For Our Competition Winners?” “Yes, I Have, Ant Or Dec.”

As part of the process for ensuring that his single, “Christmas Is All Around,” will be a success, Billy Mack takes part in an exaggerated promotional press tour that he very clearly hates every single moment of.

One of the stops on Billy’s promotional tour is an appearance alongside British television presenters Ant and Dec. But of course, Billy being Billy, he has no idea which of the two men is Ant and which is Dec, leading to him humorously responding, “Yes, I have, Ant or Dec.” Billy truly could not care less.

Billy Defuses An Awkward Moment:

“Let’s Get Pissed And Watch Porn.”

When Billy reveals to his longtime pal Joe that he has become the love of his life somehow, the other man naturally begins to get a little weepy. It should be obvious by then, to both Joe and viewers alike, that Billy Mack is not a man of many emotions, or any emotions at all, really.

So how does Billy handle getting himself out of this awkward situation of his own creation? By suggesting that they spend their Christmas by “get[ting] pissed and watch[ing] porn.” A true romantic holiday evening, in Billy’s mind.

A Man Of Not-So-Simple Taste:

“Hello? Elton! Of Course. Of Course. Send An Embarrassingly Big Car And I’ll Be There.”

Based on Billy’s outlandish outfits, which largely consist of flashy colored shirts and extravagantly patterned jackets, it should be clear that Billy is hardly a man of modest means or tastes, even when he is on a desperate comeback tour.

When he is invited to a holiday party via phone call, it’s only fitting that such an opulently inclined man is invited to Elton John’s home. Even more telling? That Billy insists that Elton “send an embarrassingly big car and [he]’ll be there,” further highlighting his love of the lavish life.

That Time Billy Gave An Overly Honest Interview:

“Best Shag You Ever Had?” “Britney Spears. No, Only Kidding. She Was Rubbish.”

There are many aspects of Love Actually that have aged poorly, but one of Billy’s funniest jokes is one that would absolutely never fly today. Billy continues his promotional appearances on a radio talk show, where he is asked, point-blank, about the “best shag [he] ever had.”

His response? “Britney Spears. No, only kidding. She was rubbish.” It’s played as one of the film’s biggest jokes, given his ribald nature and the way in which he subverts audience expectation shortly afterward. But following the Free Britney movement, this joke doesn’t feel as “fresh” as it once did.

Billy’s Self-Awareness In Studio:

“This Is Sh*t, Isn’t It?” “Solid Gold Sh*t, Maestro.”

In case there was any doubt about whether Billy knows just how bad his music is, his first scene in the film goes to great lengths to hammer it in time and again that he knows the truth and doesn’t care.

After multiple failed attempts to record the rewritten version of his song’s chorus, Billy finally succeeds by forcing the extra syllable into the change from “love is all around me” to “Christmas is all around me,” cringing all the way through. By the time the song is wrapped, Billy is all too happy to quip, “This is sh*t, isn’t it?” Joe’s response – “Solid gold sh*t, maestro” – naturally pleases him.

Uncle Billy’s Life Advice:

“Here’s An Important Message From Your Uncle Bill: Don’t Buy Drugs. Become A Pop Star And They Give You Them For Free.”

Love Actually has many great characters, but Billy Mack is arguably the film’s best character precisely because he doesn’t follow the rules of the conventional romantic comedy universe. At the end of the day, Billy Mack is not a very good person, and the film delights in exploring his depravity with every subsequent scene.

One of the most memorable and hilarious examples takes place in the aforementioned appearance with Ant and Dec. Addressing the camera, Billy summarizes his worldview as succinctly as he can: “Here’s an important message from your Uncle Bill: don’t buy drugs. Become a pop star and they give you them for free.”

Billy Has A Way With Words:

“F**k Wank Bugger Sh*tting A*se Head And Hole!”

If there were any doubt about what kind of film Love Actually is going to be, as well as the film’s very British nature, these questions are quickly answered in the film’s first few minutes. As Billy fails to record the lyrics correctly yet again, he immediately lashes out at himself with an iconic string of profanity-laden dialogue: “f**k wank bugger sh*tting a*se head and hole!”

Whether viewers think Love Actually is the best or the worst by the film’s end, no moviegoer could ever deny that Billy Mack makes an incredible and hilarious first impression and that he has the best introduction of all of the film’s characters.

Billy’s Plea To The Little People:

“If You Believe In Father Christmas, Children, Like Your Uncle Billy Does, Buy My Festering Turd Of A Record.”

Billy Mack doesn’t seem like the kind of man anyone would want around their children in any capacity, but that doesn’t stop him from cheekily referring to himself as Uncle Billy or Uncle Bill multiple times throughout the film. As he peddles his corny Christmas song, he is often asked to connect with the children who are watching and listening to these appearances.

Of course, that’s never a particularly smart idea, since Billy is all too honest to be dealing with children, such as when he remarks that “if you believe in Father Christmas, children, like your Uncle Billy does, buy my festering turd of a record.” Not exactly child-friendly, is it?

Link Source : https://screenrant.com/love-actually-billy-macks-10-most-hilarious-quotes/

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